Chapter 5 - The Morning My Son Went Into Surgery|
Leo's surgery began at seven thirty the next morning.
I kissed his forehead before the nurses took him toward the operating room.
He was wearing a small hospital gown covered in blue stars.
His favorite dinosaur rested beside him.
He looked up at me.
"Mommy?"
"Yes, baby?"
"Will it hurt?"
My chest tightened.
"The doctors will give you medicine so you won't feel the operation. They'll help you afterward, too."
He considered that.
Then whispered:
"Will my heart be better?"
I smiled through tears.
"That's what everyone is working toward."
Leo reached for my hand.
"Can you stay?"
"I'll be right here when you wake up."
He nodded.
Then he looked toward Adrien.
The man stood several feet away, dressed in a plain black sweater instead of his usual suit.
He had been at the hospital all night.
Not giving orders.
Not making calls.
Just waiting.
Leo studied him.
"Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Is that man my daddy?"
The world seemed to stop.
Adrien went completely still.
I looked at my son.
For years, I'd wondered how I would explain his father.
I'd imagined conversations when the boys were older.
When they could understand divorce.
Abandonment.
Complicated adult mistakes.
But now Leo was lying in a hospital bed, preparing for heart surgery.
And he had asked the simplest question in the world.
I took a breath.
"Yes, sweetheart."
Leo looked at Adrien.
Then back at me.
"Really?"
I nodded.
"Really."
Adrien's eyes filled with tears.
He stepped closer.
"Hi, Leo."
My son studied him.
"You look like my brother Ethan."
Adrien laughed through tears.
"I've heard that."
Leo frowned.
"Why weren't you at my birthday?"
Adrien's face crumpled.
I felt my own eyes fill.
For a moment, he couldn't answer.
Then he knelt beside the bed.
"Because I didn't know about you yet."
Leo considered that.
"How come?"
Adrien swallowed.
"Some adults made mistakes."
My son looked serious.
"Did Mommy make a mistake?"
Adrien shook his head immediately.
"No, buddy. Your mommy has taken very good care of you."
Leo nodded.
Then asked:
"Are you staying now?"
The question broke something inside me.
Adrien looked at me.
I could see how badly he wanted to promise forever.
But he looked back at Leo and answered carefully.
"I'm going to do everything I can to be here for you and your brothers."
Leo thought about it.
Then held out his hand.
Adrien took it.
My son smiled faintly.
"Okay."
A nurse approached.
It was time.
I kissed Leo one more time.
Adrien gently touched his shoulder.
Then we watched as the bed disappeared through the operating-room doors.
The moment those doors closed, my knees weakened.
Adrien caught me before I fell.
For one second, I let him hold me.
Then I stepped away.
"I'm okay."
He nodded.
"Of course."
We sat in the waiting room.
Minutes passed.
Then hours.
I stared at the clock.
Adrien brought me coffee.
I couldn't drink it.
He brought me water.
I took two sips.
He asked whether I wanted something to eat.
I shook my head.
For once, he stopped trying to solve the problem.
He simply sat beside me.
At eleven, Dr. Bennett's nurse came out with an update.
The procedure was progressing.
Leo was stable.
But the surgical team needed more time.
I nodded.
Adrien squeezed his hands together.
For the first time, I noticed they were trembling.
"Are you scared?" I whispered.
He looked at me.
"Terrified."
I swallowed.
"Me too."
Silence settled between us.
Then Adrien asked:
"Was he always sick?"
I nodded.
"He was born smaller than the other two."
Adrien looked down.
"Did you know during the pregnancy?"
"Some concerns showed up later."
He closed his eyes.
"And you went through all of that alone?"
I thought about the pregnancy.
The exhaustion.
The fear.
The nights I cried in the shower because I didn't know how I would care for three newborns.
My sister Megan had helped.
My mother had helped before she died.
Neighbors brought food.
Friends donated baby clothes.
But the man who should have been beside me never knew.
"Not completely alone," I whispered.
Adrien looked at me.
"But without you."
His face crumpled.
"I'm sorry."
I stared toward the operating-room doors.
"I know."
At three seventeen, Dr. Bennett finally appeared.
I stood so quickly that my chair nearly fell.
"Leo?"
The surgeon removed his cap.
"The procedure is complete."
My heart stopped.
"And?"
He smiled gently.
"Leo made it through surgery. The repair went as planned, and he's being moved to intensive care for close monitoring."
I covered my mouth.
Adrien closed his eyes.
For several seconds, neither of us spoke.
Then I began crying.
Not quietly.
Not gracefully.
I cried with everything I'd been holding inside for months.
Adrien stepped closer.
This time, when he opened his arms, I didn't move away.
I let him hold me.
For one brief moment, we weren't ex-husband and ex-wife.
We were two parents terrified of losing their son.
Then Adrien's phone vibrated.
Marco.
He answered.
His expression changed.
"What?"
A pause.
"Are you certain?"
He looked at me.
His face had gone pale.
I stepped backward.
"What happened?"
Adrien swallowed.
"Marco found the attorney who handled our divorce."
My heart raced.
"The fake attorney?"
He nodded.
"And?"
Adrien's voice became quiet.
"He's alive. And he's willing to talk."
I stared.
Then Adrien continued.
"He says my father didn't arrange everything alone."
My stomach tightened.
"Who helped him?"
Adrien looked directly at me.
May you like
Then whispered:
"Someone in your family."
