Chapter 5 - The Night He Finally Kissed Me|
I lowered the phone slowly.
Marius stared at me.
"Elena?"
I stepped backward.
"Don't come closer."
His face changed.
"What did he say?"
I couldn't breathe.
"My father."
Marius went still.
"What?"
"He's alive."
For a long moment, Marius said nothing.
Then his expression hardened.
"That's impossible."
I laughed bitterly.
"Apparently that's becoming a theme in my life."
He stepped toward me.
I raised one hand.
"Stay there."
He stopped immediately.
My chest tightened.
"Marius, did you know Sergei Volkov?"
He swallowed.
"Yes."
"Did you know he was my father?"
"No."
I stared at him.
"Did you try to kill him?"
His face went white.
"Elena, listen to me."
"Answer."
He looked away.
For the first time in three years, Marius Orlov looked ashamed.
"Yes."
The word shattered something inside me.
I stumbled backward.
He reached toward me.
I flinched.
He stopped.
"Marius..."
His voice was rough.
"I was twenty-two. My father had just been murdered. I was told Sergei Volkov betrayed him."
My eyes filled with tears.
"So you went after my father?"
"Yes."
"Did you hurt him?"
Marius closed his eyes.
"I ordered men to find him."
"That's not what I asked."
He looked at me.
"No. I never found him."
I stared.
"Then why did he say you were sent to kill him?"
"Because I was."
Silence.
The truth sat between us like a weapon.
I had spent three years loving this man.
Three years memorizing his habits.
Three years wondering whether he'd ever look at me as anything more than an assistant.
Now I knew he had once been sent to kill my father.
I laughed through tears.
"God, I'm such an idiot."
Marius's expression broke.
"Don't say that."
"I fell in love with you."
The words escaped before I could stop them.
Everything went still.
Marius stared at me.
I covered my mouth.
Too late.
Three years of silence.
Destroyed in one sentence.
He took a breath.
"Elena..."
I shook my head.
"No."
"Look at me."
"I can't."
"Please."
The word nearly undid me.
Marius never said please.
Not to anyone.
I looked up.
His eyes were dark and full of something I didn't know how to name.
"How long?" he whispered.
I laughed bitterly.
"Does it matter?"
"Yes."
"Three years."
He closed his eyes.
I continued.
"Three years of loving someone who never looked at me the way I wanted."
His jaw tightened.
"That's not true."
I stared.
"What?"
He stepped closer, stopping well before he reached me.
"I looked at you every day."
My heart pounded.
"Not like that."
His voice lowered.
"Exactly like that."
I couldn't breathe.
He looked away.
"When you started working for me, you were twenty-two. I was thirty-eight. I was your employer. I had no right to make you feel you owed me anything beyond your work."
I stared.
"And now?"
He looked at me.
"Now I'm losing the ability to pretend I don't want you."
The room seemed to spin.
For three years, I'd imagined hearing those words.
Now they arrived in the middle of a nightmare.
I shook my head.
"This isn't fair."
"I know."
"You can't tell me this when my entire life is falling apart."
"I know."
Tears rolled down my cheeks.
Marius's expression softened.
"Elena, I won't ask you for anything tonight."
I looked at him.
"Then why tell me?"
"Because you told me the truth. You deserved mine."
Silence filled the room.
Then I took one step closer.
Marius remained still.
I could see how carefully he was holding himself back.
My heart raced.
I had loved him for years.
I'd dreamed of touching his face.
Of feeling his arms around me.
Of discovering whether the cold man everyone feared could be gentle with me.
But I had also learned enough tonight to know that wanting something didn't make it safe.
"Marius," I whispered.
"Yes?"
"If I kiss you, it doesn't mean I forgive you."
His voice broke.
"I know."
"It doesn't mean I'll stay."
"I know."
I reached for his face.
His breath caught.
Then I kissed him.
For one second, he didn't move.
Then his hand rose to my cheek.
Gentle.
Careful.
As though I were something precious he was terrified of breaking.
The kiss wasn't the fierce, possessive fantasy I'd imagined.
It was quiet.
Almost sorrowful.
The kind of kiss that held three years of things neither of us had been brave enough to say.
When I pulled away, Marius rested his forehead against mine.
"I've wanted to do that for a very long time," he whispered.
My eyes filled with tears.
"Then why didn't you?"
His expression darkened.
"Because I knew the day I touched you, I would never want to let you go."
I closed my eyes.
"Marius..."
He stepped back.
"But wanting you isn't the same as having a right to keep you."
I stared at him.
For the first time, I saw the man beneath the reputation.
The man who had spent years holding himself together with discipline.
The man who was finally allowing himself to feel something dangerous.
Then his phone rang.
Dimitri.
Marius answered.
"Yes?"
His expression changed.
"When?"
A pause.
"Are they certain?"
He looked at me.
The tenderness disappeared.
"What happened?" I whispered.
Marius ended the call.
Then he said quietly:
"Your father just contacted the police."
My heart stopped.
"Why?"
May you like
Marius looked toward the window.
"He's accusing me of ordering your mother's murder."
